Dec 22, 2021 - Wednesday morning.

 

Why do I always find myself typing away at the wee hours of the night? 1AM. 2AM. Sometimes 5 or 6AM even. It's funny, though. I feel like the really good ideas always end up slipping away into my sleep, but when I'm not drowning in melatonin and actually get myself to my computer I meet my good ole friend called writer's block. This has been me all month, actually. If you couldn't tell by the sparsity of posts. The dry spell began after I published part 1 of AlphaGo, How Do You Know?... I had found myself deep in so much research and got tangled up with information I never properly sorted out before beginning that series which led me down one rabbit hole after the other, and before I knew it, I was running low on fumes. And, there I was, stranded on high way to hell. A gazillion thoughts waiting to be combed through but no comb to untangle them.

 

But, here I am at 1:25 AM, preferring to scribble away on my blog than to get some shut eye which would surely help me rid this itch in my throat (figuratively -- and literally). I've been thinking about career a lot lately. I mean, I guess I always think about it. Because I know I'm not where I belong right now. I just don't know where I do belong. There's a sound recording going viral on TikTok and Instagram lately about how the famous quote, "A Jack of all trades is a master of none", has commonly been misinterpreted out of context. The full quote is: "A Jack of all trades is a master of none, but oftentimes better than a master of one."

 

It's fascinating how a quote can become so popularly misconstrued. In this case, the popular meaning of the quote is the opposite of its intention simply by cutting off its better half, "but oftentimes better than a master of one." I struggle with this quote. Like I struggle to flip pancakes. It's so delicate. You know the truth of it tastes so good and you just gotta flip it, but you're scared and you end up making a mess of it all. I'm at a point where I've beaten the batter and made twenty horrible pancakes, debating whether or not I should try again and how.

 

In terms of career, I am a master of none. This is true. Juggling full-time data science with freelance art and free time blogging while having an affair with tons of other career prospects. They say that it takes a person 15 years to become a true master at one discipline. When I hear that, I shudder. I can't really imagine myself dedicating all of my time into one, singular craft just to become a master of it. I definitely acknowledge that there is so much beauty in this idea of mastery -- like Jiro Ono's sushi craftsmanship, for example. In terms of career, I just can't dedicate myself to one discipline. Maybe I want to be a master of thought.